In just two years, Derek and Mick created a bond that will last a lifetime.
I was matched with Derek through Friends First in early 2008 and we spent the next two years getting to know each other. I’ll never forget our first outing. I was probably overly anxious to please and entertain, and a little unsure by the end of it all whether or not I had achieved that. But that wasn’t really important, as I quickly began to understand. Being a mentor has been, selfishly perhaps, one of the most rewarding experiences of my life. We explored the city of Chicago together and discovered parts of it that neither of us had ever seen. He came to know me and poke fun at me, trust me and mistrust me for my endless pranks. He came to grow in confidence as regularly exemplified by his unending admiration of LeBron James, or his energetic abhorrence at the mere mention of a visit to an art museum (a common prank of mine) and quickly we became quite comfortable around each other.
Being a mentor is nothing extraordinary in and of itself. But what you lay the foundation for - sometimes without ever knowing or ever seeing fully manifested - is an important dynamic in a young person’s precarious path through life. We tend to be busy people living in busy times, but I always found it easy to make time for Derek.
I suspect a lot of people go into mentoring with slightly misaligned expectations. It’s not about reward or sacrifice, progress or outcomes. It’s about being you; it’s about being there for someone who may not be used to that simple notion we take for granted. It’s about being a friend to someone who needs one. What I didn’t probably expect was that in the process, I gained a friend too.
